Posts filed under ‘Parenting Plan’

Parent Coach Tips: Who Wants A Parenting Makeover?

Your Parenting Cheat Sheet

Your Parenting Cheat Sheet

You don’t have to be ugly to benefit from a beauty makeover.  Parenting is the same.  You can freshen your outlook and results with a few tricks of the trade and simple tools that will stop your minor parenting issues in their tracks. 

Go Live. At a parent conference, workshop or course, you can get so much accomplished.  See how you are making power struggles last longer and more frequent due to a parent’s bad habits.  Communication Gears clear up so many repetitive conversations.  You get to ask questions and hear the coaching of other parents which in turn may help your family.

Read & Think.  If you are a contemplative parent or going through a divorce with emotional ups and downs; a book, blog, audio product or DVD may be a good bet.  You pick the where and when yet can stop at will.  This helps you understand parenting issues at the basic level.  You may miss how to structure a useful A + B = C Statement to manage tantrums with a child, but when it is reviewable, things start to gel so your parenting moments are smoother.

Talk Shop.  Do you use conversation to make a change or decision?  Then get with the Parent Coaching Hotline.  This is so hot, so new, so unheard of, parents don’t get it.  For under $96, you become a member plus get the eBook and Home Starter Kit.  Then, just $16 a month gives you access to a Parent Coach for unlimited topics, 30 minutes per topic!  One Dad called to check in on his idea to use his daughter’s Birthday party as privilege for how she was relating to the new family after his marriage.  In minutes, he had a confident, empowered plan that worked!

 

Your Family Can Work, Beautifully!

Your Family Can Work, Beautifully!

Cheat Sheet. Feel like you forget the logic you know when you get triggered by your child?  Parenting discipline includes having a structure  that is there for your “family” even when you are off.  The Home Starter Kit has it all posted for you.  Keep track of the current Agreements that work for your family, refer to the four Communication Gears when your child is Demanding the *%$@ out of you, manage your chosen Privileges to motivate behavior choices (and they do NOT have to match the neighbors), avoid sounding like an idiot in public with your iron clad Rights worked out, let them know where you will not negotiate with Parent In Charge situations, but give lots of appropriate power through the Child In Charge list.  If you haven’t seen it you gotta check it out!

Open The Door.  Ever wished Supernanny could come to your house?  It’s certainly possible.  What you don’t realize is how much your parenting can improve even if the family is not in crisis.  A Parent Coach can see so many patterns at work in your family that are hidden to you.  It takes usually 4 hours over 2 sessions.  Go from parenting fail to parenting that amazes even you!

http://www.licensed2parent.com/self_navigation_parenting.html

October 19, 2009 at 5:45 pm Leave a comment

Parent Coach Releases The Official Parenting Handbook!

I'm Wowed By This!

I'm Wowed By This!

On Mother’s Day:  A gift to every parent out there!

Even I’ve been wondering where I’ve been!  I just released (with the amazing assistance of my brilliant and truly patient husband, Daniel) The Official Parenting Handbook.  Here’s what you need to know:

You can read it in AN HOUR!

It will upgrade your parenting from OK to killer!

It’s a Reference book on the Study of Power Struggles

There is lots more info here:

http://www.licensed2parent.com/official_parenting_handbook_land.htm

May 10, 2009 at 11:47 am Leave a comment

Parent Coaching Tip: Get Started Already! Agreements Await

A big part of the Family Plan Starter Kit

A big part of the Family Plan Starter Kit

I’ve done some research.  Here’s what those I’ve asked have said;  when they hear about my program they immediately see value and like the concepts.  Here’s what else they say.  That they don’t get started right away!  WHAT?  Are you kidding me?  The results can’t happen without getting started, and believe me the results are the Juice of our program.  You can study Power Struggles all you want, but if you don’t change anything with your kids, nothing will change.

So I asked why and here’s what they say:

Too busy to really make the plan to present to kids

Didn’t know how to explain it to the kids

Couldn’t figure out all the the parts first.

Here’s what you need to know!  Stop acting like you have to figure everything out first and then have the heavens open and the angels sing to make a difference in your family.  Want to get started today?  Here’s how…

The NEXT issue that comes up in your family, notice it and mentally mark it for your first Agreement.After things settle down, say, “The way you and your sister were fighting didn’t wotk for me, did it work for you?”

Ask, “Do you want a family that works?”

Say, “What Agreement can we have that covers fighting that we can agree to have as important?”

Once they figure this out, ask, “OK so we agree to Be Gentle and Use Words When Upset, can you agree to that?”

BAM!  You have your first Agreement.  Stop waiting for your Fairy Godmother to fix it all up for you.  When you ask yourself and your family what they Want More Of and Want Less Of in the family, you will get plenty to make into Agreements.  Cars are a great place to have these talks.  If you have media on your car, TURN IT OFF!  Way better talks that way.

You can leave your inner evil step-parent in the dust and create the fairy tale family of your dreams.  Make it happen today!

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March 29, 2009 at 8:25 pm Leave a comment

See Dawn Roth Live! The 6 Min Look At Her Parenting Crash Course

The calendar is booking up with folks wanting their community to experience The Parenting Crash Course.  We will be appearing at private schools, preschools, birth centers, womanhood/pregnancy spas, mom’s groups, performing arts schools, women’s conferences, community centers, transitional living centers for foster care youth and many more.

To see if your group can get a spot, share this link then contact us for details. 

It is a no cost way to offer value to your families and give them a way to create peace and teamwork at home.  In this economy how valuable would that be?  One Mom just reported this:  4 Days in Orlando, 3 Parks, 2 kids under 6, 1 privilege at risk = 0 POWER STRUGGLES!  Find out what that is all about.

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March 24, 2009 at 4:34 pm 2 comments

Parent Coaching Tip: Bust Out Of The Victim Parent Trap

Fill in the blank.  My child is ________________. 

What are you dealing with?  My child is sneaky, stubborn, demanding, lazy, sensitive, ungrateful…  sigh.

Think about who fills in the blank.  That’s you!  A mindful, skilled parent sees a stubborn child and knows that they can fill in the blank with another skill too!  How about cooperative?  Considerate?  Inspired?  Independent?  Industrious? 

You can't choose your neighbors

You can't choose your neighbors

The trick or game of parenting is to see what is needed in the blank and then provide experiences, opportunities and practice with those things.  It is a whole different approach to bringing up a child.  You are creating an adult by the way.  One that may work for me, marry into my family, buy a house next door or cause a fender bender on my way to work.  The experience I have with that adult you produce will be informed by what you have put into your own little blank.  Choose well.  And thanks in advance.

March 4, 2009 at 3:15 am Leave a comment

Parent Coaching: Do Parents Keep Agreements?

Who Parents The Parents?

Who Parents The Parents?

Yes, but not the same ones as your kids!  When House Rules are made by a family, it seems only fair that the adults and the kids are responsible for keeping them, right?  Not so much!

This may fly in the face of the way you have been doing things at home, but check it out:  The Agreements exist so that the children are taught a standard of behavior they are working on.  Take Being Grateful.   Kids need lots of practice with this one.  How about using a quiet voice inside?  Mom still struggling with that one?  No.

Think of the hundreds of Agreements parents are currently managing and those they have mastered over time; compare that to the Agreements listed for your family.  You figured out Be Gentle decades ago, right?  The Agreements are there to guide your child and provide a measurement for them to compare choices in the moment. 

When rules are broken, it begs a corresponding punishment.  Agreements are different.  If you don’t keep your agreement, you measure yourself (or your parent coaches you) and you choose again, knowing the consequences.  To encourage or expect a child to monitor adult behavior, point out when it is lacking and Demand a price be paid if  parent breaks their word is inappropriate power.  If you do it you are feeding the monster you are working to slay.

Adults manage their own agreements:  Speed limits, fidelity, businesses, mortages, bills, ethical and legal concerns are real and present.  Adults experience natural consequences for keeping them or not.   That is the real world, to do otherwise gives kids practice with an artificial world they can’t use to cope later on. 

There is more to learn, get the Audio Download on Agreements (and a bunch of other cool topics) here.  Five dollars for one/ 8 for $25. http://www.licensed2parent.com/services.html

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January 15, 2009 at 2:10 am Leave a comment

Parent Plan: Know What You Say

Most conflict in families are caused by Power Struggles, agreed?  Well what if you were causing ,say, half without even realizing it?  Would you want to know?  Good, I want to tell you.  It’s how you talk to your kids that is the problem.  You wouldn’t drive to work in reverse, so why are you asking a child “Can we go now?” or “Do you want to take a bath?”

These are the Communication Gears.  Knowing them makes for less upsets in families, period.  Suggest things that are low key.  Whatever dude.  Request when you are OK with getting NO or a COUNTER OFFER, and don’t when you aren’t!  When it is time to be the parent, make a Demand and be consistent, but use sparingly!  Commands are for saftey and danger.  Yell when you need to alert, not just to let off steam!!!! 

Now we can use this knowledge to teach our family or manipulate them.  Can you recognize the difference? 

Suggestions can be sweet OR sarcastic

Requests are made powerfully OR with a pretense

Demands convey respect OR dominatation

Commands imply concern OR exasperation

Start listening to How you say What you say.  Both mean something.  When your message and meaning match, you get better results.  To learn more on the entire family plan, visit the website and look for the Build A Better Family Starter Kit:  http://www.licensed2parent.com/services.html

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January 6, 2009 at 6:13 am Leave a comment

Parent Coaching: A Gift On So Many Levels

Pre Paid Coaching in progress!

Pre Paid Coaching in progress!

Four people have signed up for the Pre Paid Parent Coaching in 24 hours!  I am so excited to get started with each of them.  I could hear even in the set up call just where I need to start with one family.  This Mom really wants a set schedule for her kids to display more independence.  I know once she learns how to turn over parts of the daily routine to them, she will see a different result. 

Giving appropriate power not only reduces Power Struggles, it sends a critical message to kids:  You can do this, I trust you, go for it.  So often that message is:  I’ll do it, you can’t manage it as it should be done.  That instills doubt in a child.  Imagine your boss sharing your office and telling you what is next on your to do list!  How long would we put up with that? Kids have little choice. 

My little chef!

My little chef!

For the first time today my 6 year old chose a vegetable at the store (yellow squash), washed it, cut it (less oversight with a butter knife), and learned how to saute and season it.  He was so engaged.  He requested we add cheese, we did!  And he ate it , it was good! It was different than I would have done it but he had the golden egg of Appropriate Power. 

The gift of parent coaching...One person got the Coaching Program as a Holiday Gift for someone.  It feels very rewarding to be able to provide parent coaching both easily and affordably.  The parent plan makes such an impact on the child, the parent, the family, and the people those kids will grow into.  A gift on so many levels.

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November 25, 2008 at 11:45 pm Leave a comment

Parent Coaching: Affordable, On Demand Service

Parent Support is a phone call away!

Parent Support is a phone call away!

Parents love my program.  They get results and want to know how to fully put it to use in their own family.  Up to now, the best way to do that was to attend a live event (not always convenient) or work with me in the home as your personal coach (not always in the budget).  These options were limited in how far the program could reach and that was my biggest concern.  I am compelled to get this message to the families who want and need it!  Now I can…

If you ever wished you had access to an expert Parent Coach when your parenting went haywire or your results were awful, this is the program for you.  The Pre Paid Parent Coaching program gives you affordable yet on demand support when you need it.  Under $20 per month gets you 30 to 60 minutes on the phone with a Parent Coach working on a parent plan custom for your family plus discounts on tools, products, hourly coaching and live events.  There is nothing else out there like it. 

All your questions and curiosity can be handled on the website www.licensed2parent.com then click the button for Pre Paid Parent Coaching.  Please share this post with the next parent that complains to you or is frustrated about being a parent.  They are doing the best they can, yet if they are willing to take a look at their own behavior, their best can get better very quickly!

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November 23, 2008 at 10:59 pm Leave a comment

Parent Coaching: Games Families Play

I was coaching a family the other day.  Great parents.  Strong marriage.  Cool kids.  They all reported feeling upset, frustrated and angry at one another on a regular basis.  Sound familiar?  Parents are often surprised that getting coached can help all types of families.  The idea that only families in crisis or misery can use coaching is a myth.  Even great families can see improved results.  Here’s why:

Imagine if your game came with no rules!

Imagine if your game came with no rules!

 The Game is On

When families come together, or get created, it is either by choice (marriage, adoption) or by birth.  The adults seem to have all the power and the children are struggling for that power.  However you got into your family, you are still impacted by the dynamics at play. It is as if there is a game being played without the playbook. 

Imagine you join a group with a hugely important job to do but there are no rules, the teams are unclear, the plan of action keeps changing, you are not sure how to get points, how to win or lose is a mystery and the objective has never been explained.  Sounds fun, huh?

 

This game is being played all over the world by families.  A good friend of mine once said, “In the absence of good information, we make things up!”  Sound familiar?  If parents and kids are all making up their actions and reactions without a plan, a goal, a playbook and general game play rules, the result can never be better than haphazard. 

 

Coaching Is the Approach

Getting coached is the equivalent of creating your family playbook.  Choosing the goals you have as a family defined as the kind of adults you want to set loose on the world, setting up your basic agreements, getting clear guidance on who is in charge of what decisions, what rights and privileges work for your family and how to communicate all of this to the group is where you define the game you play together. 

 

By offering parents a system to create their family as they would like it to be, we are affecting the lives of each member. Families that work have better days at school, are more productive at work, have less absenteeism to deal with behavior issues, enjoy less stress and are able to focus on contributing to others in a larger sense because they are not bogged down by the general concerns of a family that does not work. 

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November 18, 2008 at 7:50 pm Leave a comment

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Dawn Roth

My mission is to cause a monumental shift in parenting as we know it! Wanna help?

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